Anna Nicole Smith's sister, Donna Hogan, has decided that she'd like to physically transform herself into her late sister. Ah, what a lovely and not at all DISTURBING way to pay tribute to a late sibling. The Texan housewife in her forties revealed her plans to dye her hair and get her breasts enlarged so that she may chat up Hugh Hefner in the hopes of posing in Playboy. Cause the only thing better than a hot mess, is a hot NAKED forty-something mess up in Playboy.

"A few years ago, Playboy approached me and I almost agreed to do it. But I was too chicken. My boobs weren't big enough," Hogan tells Steppin' Out's Chaunce Hayden. "But now, if Playboy called, I would probably do it. I just had a birthday and I'm going to treat myself to new boobs."

And by "a few years ago," you know she can't possibly mean any less than ten, and mostly likely with the understanding that Anna pose in the spread with her sister. Oh, but these physical enhancements she has planned aren't just to be used for the purposes of advancing her budding soft-core porn career, Hogan also wants to use her new assets for the purpose of getting back at Howard K. Stern, Anna's former lawyer and partner.

"I could just slap the [bleep] out of him. I'd love to just beat the [bleep] out of him. But instead I think I'll just torture him . . . hug and kiss on him and act like I like him, then just walk away and leave him like that, all sexually frustrated."

This one's got some grand plans. As if all a woman needed to get a guy turned on is giant breasts and a head of blond hair. (*Nervous laughter*) Please! Straight men are much more complicated than that!

Right?

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