Archive for the 'Tom Cruise' Category

Quick Hits: Tom Cruise Squints

Thursday, July 19th, 2007

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Germany Finally Gives up and Agrees to Embrace the Crazy

Friday, June 29th, 2007

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Tom Cruise will most likely be granted permission to shoot his WWII drama in Germany, refuting widely-held rumors that the Scientologist actor had been banned from filming in the European country. At the beginning of this week, Defense Ministry representative, Harald Kammerbauer had said that Cruise and company “will not be allowed to film at German military sites if Count Stauffenberg is played by Tom Cruise, who has publicly professed to being a member of the Scientology cult.” However, because the subject matter of the film is one that many German officials would enjoy seeing portrayed to a wide audience, a more welcoming sentiment is being expressed toward Cruise and his production company.

The German film industry, however, sees Cruise and production partner Paula Wagner’s film as an important piece of historical nonfiction, with Studio Babelsberg heads Christoph Fisser and Carl Woebcken–who are in talks with UA to sign on as co-producers–calling Valkyrie one of the “too few examples of military opposition to Hitler’s regime.”

And now, it has been reported that while no official paperwork had been filed for the production as of yet, ministry officials have stated they would “look agreeably” upon any request made to do so. Ha! Let Germany deal with Cruisey for a bit. Although, it’s not as much to fun to watch these days, now that he seems to be all settled and stuff. I much rather wish he would have headed over there, back when he was doing all kinds of couch-jumping and love-declaring. Now, he’s just a shell of his former crazy self.

Tom Cruise Hits Up Amsterdam

Friday, June 29th, 2007

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After having some downtime in Spain and France, Tom Cruise is back on the promotion trail. This time it’s for his production company United Artists.

Hundreds of fans turned up to meet with Tom Cruise, presenting him with special pairs of commemorative wooden clogs, as he attended the expo for the first time to promote his new films Lions for Lambs and Valkyrie.

Lions for Lambs, Robert Redford’s film about the war on terror, is the first film to be released by UA since the Cruise bought the floundering company with partner Paula Wagner. Valkyrie is a World War II thriller, to be directed by Brian Singer.

I’m thinking that Tom Cruise may be visiting Brian Singer’s set quite often to get some personal updates.

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More photos of Tom Cruise greeting fans in Amsterdam are after the jump.

Germany A Lot Less Tolerant Of Crazy Than America

Tuesday, June 26th, 2007

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Germany is way smarter than America. They’ve banned Tom Cruise from filming his new Hitler assassination flick “Valkyrie” because of his insane religious beliefs. Scientology drains all of my liberal tendencies for some reason and turns me into a complete facist and oppressor. I just picture gay guys making sure other gay guys stay closeted and depressed people discouraged from taking medication which could help them and undiagnosed autistic kids sitting in front of tv’s while their families ignore them and it makes it very easy.

The World War II drama focuses on a plan to assassinate Adolph Hitler, but despite the German theme,the crew will not be able to film on German bases. While they have not received official requests on the project, Harald Kammerbauer, a Defense Ministry spokesman told Reuters, Cruise’s faith is behind their decision to refuse to allow filming in the locales.

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More on Tom’s German snub after the jump.

Tom Cruise REALLY Into David Beckham I Mean Soccer

Saturday, June 23rd, 2007

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Sources say that Tom Cruise is looking to purchase Becks’ soccer team, the L.A. Galaxy, for 80 million. Damn. That’s some scratch. Is soccer that popular? Granted, soccer players can be hotsy, but does Xenu approve of this? Tom better sublimate his gay lust into more preaching against psychiatry instead of spending that much cheddar on blond guys. Or Xenu will smite him with a laser bolt. From the Death Star. It’s orbiting Uranus.

The Hollywood actor is a huge soccer fan and wants to give his financial backing to the Los Angeles Galaxy.

A source said: “To have Tom’s backing would be amazing - there’s no way Galaxy bosses would turn down that opportunity.”

Beckham signed for Galaxy this January on a reported 128 million five-year deal although he doesn’t start playing for them until next month.

Becks better keep in mind that Cruise ownership comes with Scientology lectures. And jock checks.

TomKat Celebrates David Beckham’s Last Game With Real Madrid

Monday, June 18th, 2007

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With TomKat in Madrid for David Beckham’s last game, the foursome decided it was time to party once the hoopla surrounding the winning of David’s final game in Spain. The friends headed off to Shabay Night Club, where they celebrated until 7a.m. in the morning. I’d love to see what Tom Cruise looks like after a night of partying.

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(Images courtesy of PR Photos)

More photos of the David, Victoria, Tom and Katie after the jump.

Tom Cruise Can Marry You

Monday, June 18th, 2007

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Tom Cruise is so high up in the Scientology racket than he can marry people. He’s what’s called a “clear” and can telekinetically affect your molecules and start fires with his mind. He can also commune with plants and stop your heart with one punch to the chest. Watch out. Tom might be presiding over the alien nuptials of a friend of his.

Tom Cruise is at the highest level of “clear” in Scientology - and now he may even perform a wedding for a friend, Australian heir James Packer, one of the church’s richest benefactors, Women’s Wear Daily reports. Packer, who inherited a $6.5 billion fortune when his father, Kerry, died last year, weds model-turned-singer Erica Baxter Wednesday on France’s Cote d’Azur. A mystery client, believed to be Packer, has booked the entire Grand Hotel du Cap-Ferrat and the Hotel du Cap-Eden Roc, presumably for his guests.

The couple is set to honeymoon in a crater on Mars, after which they will ascend into a black hole to be with Xenu. Can they take Tom with them?

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More photos of Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes visiting the German Church of Scientology headquarters at 2.45am in the morning this past Friday night.

The One And Only Katie Holmes

Tuesday, May 22nd, 2007

According to today’s Page Six, Katie Holmes and Tom Cruise are in uproar over a case of identity theft…with a twist.
A blond-haired, blue-eyed fashion student, who claims to be a virgin, has changed her name to Katee Holmes and is launching a porn career in which she’ll be deflowered in her first movie…
Holmes’ camp is […]