(WENN)

J. Harvey is my East Coast lovah. Just don't tell my boyfriend that--or my other East Coast lovahs, for that matter. But sometimes, it's like he's trying to make my job of selecting my favorite five posts of his from the past week incredibly difficult. Seriously, this week was TOUGH. So, before you make some comments like, "Um, I can't believe you didn't include (insert post)," take it down a notch. It's cause it's the Friday Five, not the Friday (insert the infinity symbol). But, here's my attempt to let you know what you definitely should NOT have missed this past week.

1. Charlize Theron Must Have Gotten Some Good Shit - When reporting on Charlize Theron's spontaneous catwalk strutting in public, J. said:

What a totally random story. Then again, who DOESN'T bust out in a vogueing battle when the conversation's boring and the food sucks?

And I laughed. Because that's exactly how I spend most of my evenings. Although honestly, I just can't vogue like I used to.

2. Britney Drives Guy Back Into Rehab - J.'s description of Britney's current "look" is sadly, very, very accurate. Fortunately, it's also very, very amusing.

3. Nick Carter Is Sad - When J. referred to Nick as "spokesperson for The Sweaty And Previously Hot," it made me happy.

4. Kate Hudson Didn't Sleep With JT - Every once in a while, J. goes off on a wonderfully tangential journey that takes you far away from the original story, but it so much more entertaining than real life that you almost wish it were true. In this case, we took a trip to the Wal-Mart bathroom with two endearing characters that almost made my cry. It was that good. I think I smell a Valerie Bertinelli Lifetime movie in the works, y'all.

5. Lindsay Lohan: Not A Thief - Anytime J. uses exclamation points (which is when he REALLY means it) I imagine him furiously typing. And when he yells the following:

She doesn't have seven pairs of eyes! She's not a creature from Dungeons & Dragons!

It amuses me but makes me a little sad. Cause I wish she were.

Feel free to point out the awesomeness that I may have missed, just don't yell at me about it. Well, if you do, just limit it to one exclamation point per person, please.

HAPPY FRIDAY!

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