The Jennifer Lopez/Marc Anthony Tour descended on Atlantic City on Friday night. Like a plague of winged monkeys or the Apocalypse. They played the Trump Taj Mahal, and the show was evenly split between the two. This is Jennifer’s first tour. I’m sure her room had to be painted white, but not actually white. Maybe more of an egg cream shade mixed with an off white. And if the lilies weren’t from the exact rain forest Jennifer likes, some poor desk bitch was out on the dole.

After nearly 90 minutes, Lopez (who has been the subject of increasing pregnancy rumors) came onstage wearing a flowing baby doll top and flared bottoms by Roberto Cavalli. She opened with her new single “Do It Well,” and showed off some low-key hip-hop dance moves.

A few songs into her set, a breathless Lopez asked the crowd, “How amazing is Marc?” She added: “This is a really special night for us … This is my first tour ever! It’s been a really special year.”

I hope she re-enacted that crazy-ass video where she’s beating the crap out of guys in a fetish club to get to her little brother who’s locked in a closet washing dishes. Have you people seen that? There’s a girl in a hamster wheel! And a furries! Jennifer’s a kinky bitch! And she’s pummeling guys! And she stops in her rescue efforts to work it out in a line dance. SWAT teams should all do that.

More photos of Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony in concert are after the jump.

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